What message are we sending our daughters?: Let's talk about it

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Hello lovely people,

This weekend my sister did something that I completely disagree with, and I thought I'd get you wonderful people to chime in and give your thoughts.  My niece (who will be 2 in May) recently started playing soccer.  Well, on Saturday morning she missed soccer because my sister had started taking the braids out of my niece's hair, and didn't get finished in time for soccer.  So I said, why didn't you just leave the braids in and take them out after soccer.  However, she declared that her hair looked too bad to leave those braids in.  Well, I was shocked and appalled that hair kept my niece from getting out, moving, exercising, and having fun.  Now not to come down on my sister, because this type of phenomenon is something that I've seen repeatedly, and have been bothered by each time (and since I'm not a parent I can't say what I would have done in this situation). 

In working at after school programs I have witnessed multiple little Black girls being told to not get dirt in their hair while playing.  I've also seen one little girl get in trouble when being picked up by her mother because she got dirt in her hair.  Also, I've seen staff working at an after school program tell a little girl that she couldn't play on certain equipment out of fear that she would get dirt in her hair which would lead to a very unhappy parent at pick up time. 

Now, all of these scenarios really bother me because it is sending the message, in my humble opinion, that it is more important to make sure that your hair is maintained "properly" than it is for you to have fun or to exercise.  Although I'm sure this isn't the message these people are trying to send to their daughters, in reality it is exactly what is being communicated.  To me, this is punishing little Black girls for doing what it is that children do, and for doing something that everyone else is being allowed to do freely.   

So, I'd like to hear from you all, especially parents.  Do you think that these types of scenarios send the message of hair/beauty comes before fun and exercise?  If you're a parent have you ever done anything similar?  Let me know....

That's all for now,

Tootles

"style a day" challenge update

High mock bun with a simple Black headband on an old twist out.  I loved this style.  My hair was out of my face, it was easy to assecorize and the bun was very loose so that there was no headache involved

Hello there lovely people,

Well, I survived my "style a day" challenge.  The challenge was good because it made me try some new things.  However, I didn't like feeling compelled to wear a different style each day for a week.  Perhaps the challenge would feel a little less strict if I did less new styles per week.  One very nice thing about my challenge is that I found new styles that I quite like.  Actually, I ended up with the problem of having to change my hair each day because I found a couple of styles I wanted to repeat.  Two of my favorite styles (which came from Naptural85) were a high mock bun and a bohemian infinity twist.  The high bun was achieved by using a large elastic headband to pull all of my hair up toward the top of my head (I doubled the band so it would be tight enough to stay).  I then tucked the ends under and secured with bobby pins pinning around the headband in a mock bun.  I really liked this because I like buns, but they give me a headache from the tension.  The next style, the bohemian infinity twist, was achieved by making a slight side part and then making a flat twist around my head to the opposite side.  Once on the opposite side I ended the twist with a bit of hair left out (so I started the twist on the right side of hair and left a bit out on the left side).  At the end of the twist I two strand twisted the end as normal.  On the other side I made two flat twists going down and then braided the two flat twists and the large twist that came from the other side together.  This last style I really liked and it really did look bohemian.  I think I'll like it even better when my hair gets longer.  

So, I survived my style a day challenge, and I'm glad I did it.  I don't intend to do this particular challenge again, but maybe I will try a style a week challenge for a month.  I think in this challenge I will wear at least one new style a week.  

Let me know if you have tried any new styles that you really enjoy. 

Tootles 

Hair wear out challenge

My hair is a four day old twist out with the two front sides slightly twisted and pulled back: Day 1 of "style a day" challenge

Hello lovely people,

As briefly mentioned in my mini twists update post, Breana so rudely initiated a "wear out" challenge for me.  She (accurately) pointed out that I hardly wear my hair out.  Typically, my hair is in twists or pulled back into some sort of bun.  So, beginning January 2 I started the "wear out" challenge.  I was challenged to wear my hair out (and dress cute, but that's a different story) every day for a week.  Well, more than a month later I am still wearing my hair out just about every day.  Since the beginning of my challenge I have worn twists once (the day I moved, I needed something out of the way and convenient) and two french braids for 2 days (and they were cute).  I must admit (but don't tell Breana) it was actually a really good idea.  I've now gotten so used to wearing my hair out that it is actually weird to pull it back. 

However, after a little while I was getting a bit tired of wearing the same style (a twist out with a side or middle part).  So, I am now challenging myself to wear a different style every day the rest of this week.  I am actually quite excited about this.  When I was a "new natural" I wore my hair in different styles all the time it seems, but now I have gotten comfortable and lazy.   Well, no more!  One of my favorite things about being natural is that I can do a variety of hair styles and they all look different and cute.  I am currently gaining ideas/inspiration from Naptural85 (I'm pretty sure I'm obsessed with her youtube channel). 

Today, the first day of my new challenge, I wore my hair down with the two front sides slightly twisted and pinned back.  This style was not so different, but different enough.  I liked my hair today, and will certainly wear this style again (although next time I'll find cute clips to clip it back with, the ones I wore today were just plain black).  I haven't decided what to do tomorrow, but I am pretty excited that I will be trying something a little different.  I feel like I'm re-falling in love with my hair.  Kudos to Breana!  So, if any of you are feeling in a rut, or bored with your hair I highly recommend the "style a day" challenge.  I also highly recommend checking out Naptural85's channel for some style inspirations (or just general natural hair inspiration).  Most of the styles on her channel are simple and she has styles for different hair lengths (and of course you can always modify to fit your hair if need be).  So, who's in with me?  I want someone else to take on the style a day challenge with me (relaxed, natural, straight, kinky or curly)......let me know....

Love, peace and happiness,

Tootles for now

Quick mini twists updated

This was day one of my "wear out challenge":  my hair is in a twist out.  I used my usual hair products of Cantu Shea Moisture Leave in and flax seed gel.  Excuse the house mess, this was during packing time. And is it just me or is God shining love on the wall above me?

Hey there,

So I realized one day that I never gave an update on my mini twists.  I ended up only keeping the twists in for a little over 2 weeks (starting from the time of total twist completion).  I took the twists out mainly because I missed my hair.  My scalp was also getting itchy, I suppose from not washing my hair.  Taking the twists out was super easy and fast!!!!  Overall, I think that the mini twists were good; however, if I do them again (and I probably will) I will change a few things.  First, I would make the twists a bit smaller.  My twists were small, but not tiny.  I think if they were smaller I would have kept them longer and I think I would have liked the look of them better.  Second, I would wash my hair.  Naptural85 doesn't wash her hair while wearing twists, but my scalp was itchy!!  Also, I would probably re-twist the front after about 2 weeks or so.  The twists still looked really good when I took them out, but the front was starting to get a tad frizzy.  Fourth, I would do more styles with the twists.  I think that making them smaller will aid in more styling options too.  

So, after I took the twists out Breana and I went for a walk.  I told her that I took the twists out because I missed my hair, and she so rudely pointed out that I never even where my hair out.  True.  So, I took on a wear hair out challenge for a week (began January 2).  I'll report on how that challenge went later, but I will give a little preview and say that since that day I have worn my hair up once, in two braids 3 days and in twists one day......

Well, that's all for now lovely people
Tootles