Love your curls for what they are

Hey there my lovely curlies,

So, I've started a new book, Curly Girl, by Lorraine Massey, and a lot of it is centered around changing your attitude about curly hair (book review to come). Reading some of the stories in the book of women who for so long, and some still today, hated their curls made me reflect on my own feelings about my hair. For so long we've been told, both directly and indirectly, that our hair is bad, wrong, and ugly. We've been told for so long and by so many people that our natural hair isn't good enough that many of us have came to believe that our hair isn't beautiful or good enough. Wearing your hair natural is more than just deciding to pursue a particular hairstyle, but it's also pursuing a particular attitude. Wearing your hair natural says I'm beautiful the way God made me and my hair doesn't have to look as society says for it to be desirable, accepted, sophisticated and wonderful. I remember when I first came home after the BC, my mom told me that my hair looked unprofessional and just plain nappy. I have to admit that at first, hearing the "n" word hurt a bit. For so long nappy was the worst word that you could use to describe a person's hair. Well, so what if my hair is nappy? Who's to say that nappy is a bad thing? As children we have our hair pressed and permed, and inadvertently what our loved ones are telling us by doing this is that our natural hair is wrong or ugly. It takes time to undo the years of falsehoods and to realize that your natural hair is beautiful. It doesn't matter if your hair is straight, curly, kinky, nappy or nonexistent, know that the way God made your hair is beautiful. So while many of us still desire to have long silky locs made up of perfect ringlet curls that flow and swing when we walk, for a lot of us that will never be a reality. It took me a while to accept that there was no miracle product out there to naturally turn "Shayna" texture hair into "Alicia Keys" texture hair; we are different people with a different genetic background and different hair textures. Now that I've accepted and learned to love my hair for the texture it is-curly, kinky, nappy-I'm so much happier. I LOVE my hair, and I have to honestly say it took me some time to get here. However, now that I love my hair, I feel a lot more comfortable in myself. As cliche as it sounds, truly accepting your hair for what it is-beautiful in its own right-makes such a large difference in your self-esteem and your outlook on life and others. Okay, I'm finished being all sappy and introspective, but I want anyone reading this who is not comfortable with your natural hair to know that your hair need not look like any other person in order for it to be beautiful. Healthy hair is what's beautiful!!!

Tootles for now,

Lady Shay